Evian says on their water bottles:
It is no wonder therefore, Evian is The Official Bottled Water of The Championships, Wimbledon. Its purity makes it the choice of champions.
Even ignoring the gross misuse of the English language, what a load of crap. It’s the “choice of champions” (and losers) because you spent a buttload of money to sponsor the tennis. They’re not allowed any other water bottle on the court. That doesn’t make it a choice.
Also, your water isn’t more pure because it’s “been filtered for 15 years through the pristine heights of the French Alps” (the pristine heights? What does that even mean?) It’s got a lot of minerals in there specifically because of that fact, making it less pure.
Let’s finish off with their strapline, “Live Young”, which means absolutely nothing at all. Presumably they mean “live youthfully”, which has shit all to do with drinking bottled water.
(You do have a good bottle design, though.)
I see your curmudgeonliness is coming along nicely :)
madoo
July 9th, 2009
Well… they are French.
Luther
July 9th, 2009
Pristine heights: glorious snow-capped peaks, quite different from the grubby, littered, defiled mountain tops of other European countries. Pure: containing only ‘natural substances’. ‘Natural substances’: (1) substances not made by evil man; (2) substances stupid people think they understand.
Dave
July 9th, 2009
I would like to buy a drink bottle that was all fancy, covered in marketing, made to look like bottled water, but was actually filling and refilling with tap water.
madoo
July 9th, 2009